so i've been away for quite some time, my faithful readers... all 3 of you. but I'm back to announce that I'm almost 14 weeks pregnant! peter and i are so excited and a bit nervous. i never expected to be scared, but now I understand the thought of carrying around a little human inside of me. at the same time, i sometimes forget that i am with child since i had a very mild 1st trimester and i'm not so much showing.
yesterday i was in gap looking at maternity clothes and i felt silly, like everyone was sizing me up, thinking "what that girl doing in that section of the store?" i probably need to wait a few more weeks/months until i really need to start shopping there or i'll just buy stuff online so i don't have to be sized up.
i feel a weird tension concerning weight gain. part of me really wants to start showing so i can start feeling pregnant, but i also like that i'm not showing yet. it's hard in a culture that tells women that beautiful is 5'10" size 0. our culture should be celebrating a pregnant body as that is what our bodies were made to do. weird to think that since the age of 15 (yes, i was a late bloomer) my body has been ready and willing to host a baby. now it is actually getting to do what it was designed to do, amazing.
so check back more often as I hope to be more diligent about posting pictures and thoughts on this journey.